Wilson Counseling: The Armchair Chronicles

Criticism leads to shame. Self-compassion leads to action. This year, instead of making a resolution that I won't keep, I am resolving to focus on being more compassionate to myself. Sounds hokey, I know. "What does that even mean?" you may be asking. Self-compassion is largely about treating yourself with the same compassion you would treat others you care about even when you fail. So, for example, instead of berating myself for parts of my body that I don't like, I can acknowledge that I work hard and use my body well and that I am a work in progress. It's okay if parts of me are not what I want them to be at all times. That compassionate attitude towards myself allows me to work on what I want to change without shaming me. Shame, after all,  just leads to inaction and poorer self-esteem. "Suffering, failure, and imperfection is part of the shared human experience." --Dr. Kristin Neff Kristin Neff is a researcher and professor who ...

I was attending church, and during announcements, one of the members (who happened to be George H W Bush’s grandson) got up to encourage people to get involved in Big Brothers Big Sisters. It is an organization that he himself was very involved with and was passionate about. He talked about how his grandfather had taught him that he is responsible for being a point of light in the world.  When 41 spoke about the 1,000 points of light, I always assumed it was just a political talking point. But, I realized at that moment, that it was more than just a talking point. It was part of the Bush legacy, something he passed on to those who were willing to listen, including his grandchildren.  No one who does anything of importance has a spotless or perfect record. That’s not what life is really about anyways. Life is messy, love is messy, caring and fighting for what you believe in is messy.  But, when it’s my time to go, I would like to know that my lega...