Wilson Counseling: The Armchair Chronicles

We will never experience intimacy in relationships if we blame others for our problems "I don't share anything personal with my mom", my client told me. "My mom is one of those people who always blames other people for her problems. When I was growing up she told me the reason we did not have enough money is because my dad had abandoned her by divorcing her. According to her, my dad was also the reason she did not have any friends, that she gained so much weight, that she had to live in a broken down house, that she was alone in life. At first I thought my dad was a bad person, but I figured out after listening to my mom blame others for every problem in her life that she had a messed up perspective. I knew if I shared with her things I was struggling with, I knew that she would go negative, blame me or someone else, and the whole conversation would just depress me." Blame is the discharging of discomfort and pain Why do we blame others for ou...